06 August 2012

She Never Learns

Some of my best entertainment comes straight from the mouth of my Sweetheart.

She has no filter to keep things from coming out, and honestly, part of me hopes she never develops one. This evening, she was reading the news after supper when she suddenly said, "I want to by the Princess a chastity belt. And Little Man, too. They make them for boys and girls."

Now, in today's world, chastity belts might not be a bad idea. That wasn't the entertaining part. The fun came in because, as usual, the little pitcher was near and her ears were wide open. My Princess loves clothes, so she heard "belt" and perked right up. She ran over and said, Mommy, what's a chastity belt?"

I've learned to look fast any time Sweetheart says stuff like this, because the look on her face is absolutely priceless! Kind of like a deer caught in the headlights. Her eyes go wide as she realizes what's coming and then she shakes a little as she tries to find a way out before her head drops when she hears the inevitable question and understands the truth. There's no way out. My daughter won't take no for an answer and she's just too doggone smart to be put off by the whole, "We'll talk about it later" bit.

Nope, Sweetheart managed to forestall it by saying it's a special kind of belt, but that just means that I'll be going everywhere with them for the next few weeks. Cuz I know from experience what's gonna happen. It'll come soon, and I just pray I'll have a camera ready when my precious little child pulls on Mommy's arm in the checkout line of some store and says, in her wonderfully loud preschooler voice, "Mommy, you forgot to buy my special chastity belt now?"