The ongoing story of one man's ongoing (and sometimes exciting) exploration of life.
25 June 2013
Yet Another Thing I Never Expected To Hear
Now, having been married for seven years now, and having two children with this woman, I knew better than to ask what had happened. Instead, I took her downstairs to watch some TV that wasn't animated and relax.
My plan worked well, apparently. As we were getting ready to watch the show, she suddenly said, "You don't understand! The boy grabbed a fork and was trying to comb my hair with it!! It hurt!"
I always seem to miss the more interesting events of the day.
24 June 2013
Wow!
16 June 2013
I Have a Five Year Old Teenager
10 June 2013
Great Moments
Ah, Ya gotta love those moments when you wish your camera was in your hand and ready. They fly by so fast, leaving only the laughter and a fun memory.
And sometimes a red face...
I was sitting with the kids outside of the Kohl's dressing room while Sweetheart was trying on swimsuits. She was getting flustered as she tried on suits. Seriously, why do women actually put themselves through this yearly orgy of masochism? Why not they just do what men do when we feel less than studly in our swimsuit, and stick to baggy shorts and t-shirts?
In any case, she came out in a very loudly patterned one piece. As I started to give her a once over, Princess reached out and grabbed her Mommy's breasts, one in each hand, and said - in that really loud little girl voice - "Mommy, what are these?!"
I thought I was going to wet myself!
I do believe the look on my wife's face paid for every moment I've ever spent corralling squirmy kids outside dressing rooms.
04 June 2013
03 June 2013
Harsh Honesty
02 June 2013
Have ya ever...
Have Ya ever scared the daylights out of yourself? I mean scared yourself so well that you just about wet yourself?
Today, I did.
Recently, I had a new security system installed. And being a man, I had to get all the cool doohickies that came with it. My favorite - until today - is the app that lets me control the house automation and security from my phone. Today, the family was out and I was gathering up the tools for my to do list. I sat down at the table to check my list again, then headed for the back door. Now mind you, I had been going inane out for a bit, and the alarm wasn't set. It was just me and the Furball, and he can't reach the control panel. And no matter how much he begs, I'm not getting him a phone, so he can't control the system.
Well, I opened that back door and all help broke loose. The siren (which I'm pretty sure is louder than advertised) started wailing, he dog started running in circles and howling and a loud, disembodied voice directly behind me suddenly said, "Hello, is everything okay?"
I dang near had a heart attack.
Who knew you could butt dial your alarm?